Chapter Three

Tuesday Evening

Chapter Three - A Quilt

It has occurred to me that there are times when information is presented to us, and we take no notice of it at all.  It may be because it bores us, we see no relevance to our lives, or we aren't ready for it.  Whatever the initial reason for ignoring the information or discarding it, if we are lucky, the insistent fact or idea or inspiration comes back time and time again.  Eventually, we find ourselves ready to acknowledge the tidbit that has been offered.  Understanding it may happen all at once or in stages.  The last two chapters and this one, too, mark the gradual growth of my understanding due to a confluence of ideas and events.

 Ever since I started writing this journal, I was aware of a thread that seemed to be stitched here and there throughout my entries.  Sometimes it was a barely discernable stitch, sometimes it was boldly twining through a paragraph, and other times it disappeared completely.  I found myself musing about the gifts handed down by women from one generation to the other.  Those silent offerings that shyly insert themselves into our lives.  I struggled to explain how I was suddenly aware that my female ancestors fostered in me a love of the "feminine" art as expressed most commonly with a needle.   That awareness made me feel a new, stronger tie to those women.  "Daisy Makes Do", a wall hanging I designed, was created to honor my sister, mother, and grandmother.  I included my three nieces whom I knew were also in a position to feel the same strong bond.  But what puzzled me most was why now?  Those three women have been gone for some time, and  why am I now working on a crazy quilt in which I will incorporate those three again.

Unfinished CzQ block (complete with wonky edges) honoring my mother

Today I went to my Crazy Quilt Class, and we all shared what we had worked on since the previous meeting.  There were a few new people in the class, and I was asked to explain what my plan and my purpose were.  I explained that  my purpose is to honor the women in my family who had endowed me with a lasting love of stitchery. My plan is to picture each of them in a crazy quilt wall hanging that represents the time period as well as an activity of the oldest of the three.  My proposed quilt has become a very important piece for me to do.  When I finished the explanation, one of the women asked me, "Are you going to use a photograph of yourself?"  I was surprised by the question and responded quickly, "No, of course not."  We went on to the topic of the day and spent several lovely hours working on our stitchery.

Just before I left, the same woman said to me, "I really think you should include yourself.  Why wouldn't you?"   Again I said I wasn't planning on it, and then she said, "At least think about including something that represents you."   On my way home, I wondered about her insistence and decided that I should give her idea some serious consideration.  Why should I include myself in this project, and why is this project so important to me now?

The two paintings, a book, and a quilt gave me the answer.   The things that are passed down - whether they are physical objects that we treasure, stories from the past that makes us a part of history, DNA that makes it possible for us to do certain activities, or ideas that are seminal in our lives - all become tangible reminders of the chain that stretches back attaching us to the past.  But it also reminds us of our place, our link, in that chain, as well as the knowledge that the chain extends into the future, too.  Why do I have to make this crazy quilt now?   Because I finally get it.  I finally am old enough to understand why my mother spent hours upon hours on genealogy, and why she spent hours telling me about her searches and her successes.  And I am old enough to acknowledge my own mortality and do my bit to make sure that not only are these women I honor going to be remembered, but that maybe I will be, also.

Given that, perhaps I should include myself in the crazy quilt.  What do you think?  Indeed, what do you think about this whole saga?  Send me your comments.